Lets pack and start over again

Looking at this blank new page today I felt that I don't want to mess it unless Its for a good reason. Waked up this morning , my eyes where opened straight to the window. The view is so gray and its raining. For some reason the sky is crying. And I am lazy to get up from my cozy bad. Its soft and warm, and kind of colorful. Of course it is, it is the second best cozy thing , the first one is naturally his hug. Coffee is on the table and I really need it right now , I'm getting more and more nervous, my charger is dead and it works like s#it , i need to press it up or down its getting on my nerves and I try to avoid to pack. Yes today I have to pack my bag for one more chapter in this life of mine. I am going to a new start.

I have never been scared to let everything behind and start over, to just pack ,take a risk and go somewhere for a new beginning, for some new meaning , for how and what I can do to improve this life and help my family. The sad thing is, I realized my country  tired of all in it. Nothing is improving, noting is going for better , no matter how hard those idiots on tv are trying to lye to us. That's media ,that's just what we need to hear to don't lose hope. And I lost that hope...I lost this feeling of safeness in this coutry,I have no hopes for futere here. I am sad every time I go because of course I love my country I have been born here and my childhood is here, my family ,bu I am traveling a lot taking other opportunities and risks to make it easier for a better life, at least I try, its not easy, I am a refugee everywhere and they point you to feel like an outsider, but there is future, outside this mess. Every time when I come back from wherever I traveled to search for better future and life happening , here in my country the  people I know are looking stressed , depressed, older, poorer,  every time is this sader picture of them...Its sad.. I am sad to see my country sinking. But what can I do? I am one little figurine.I can pack and go wherever I can to fight for a better future ,for me and my family.
Once upon a time it was easier , life here was better. And than there started wars and  greed and bastards took a piece of it by the time it came to nothing. I assume one day it will no longer exist on maps. But no one cares. The youngs are looking to go somewhere to start a new life , fresh one, because how I say its a strugle every day for surviveing and the older are just tired of fighting and they are old, they lived a good life once they wont leave it, because here is everything they worked and fighted for.Once...

For me, I guess I knew it wasn't for me to live here. I want to discover, to learn , to see, to experience...I am sick of poorness and greed , of people becoming mad on their life. I love my life and my place is where my heart is.  No matter how hard I have to fight , Ill do it and whenever I have to start over again I will. We are send here to live this life not to be passengers in it. I want memories , good once and a happy family, I want love and beautiful childhood for my kids and I want to grow old with my soul mate in peace and accomplished life. I don't want luxury I want the best life I can make for us. I think I don't ask for too much. That's why Ill do everything in my power to have it. Faith and destiny is written for us...and we cant change it, but we can make it better and wort living for.
So its time for me to move this lazy ass , start the day, start packing and start over again. Fight for what you need , for what you want. Fight with love in your heart and flowers in your hair. Fight with positivity and show to the World that you are worth of being happy and live that life you want for you and your loved one. Nobody say its easy. Its hard and the road will be full of thorns, but the roses at the end are amazingly speechlessly beautiful. If you don't do it , nobody will serve you the life you deserve. I wont live by the rules my country serves me, they cut every road I tried to make here. I wont let nobody to tell me how to live my life. I will fight with all my strength to get there and make my family proud, to make myself proud, to be with the one I love. I believe in fairytale and I will do everything to have mine like I want it to be. My prince charming is waiting for me and Ill be there.My fairytale must be written with colorful ink ..."and they lived happily ever after!"

XoxoYbell